Annoucer: 0:00

You're listening to Shut Up and Choose. The no bullshit, no excuses podcast for people who swear they wanna lose we keep choosing everything that stops them. And before we continue, if you're gonna mention mom and act like a fucking pussy the entire time, skip this one. This is 140 pounds with no shots, no diets, no pills, and not one single fucking membership slip of the gym. Just real choices that fit real life. If you're time to give me time to the bullshit, and ready for somebody to finally call you up and tell you the truth, you are in the right place. Stop coming, stop and choose this. Shulp and choose.

Jonathan Ressler: 1:09

Hey, welcome back to Shut up and choose the podcast that touches the noise. All the bullshit that does internet, gurus, and Instagram, info should have throwing your way. Eat this, don't eat that. You can't lose weight because your hormones are imbalanced, or you gotta do this special gut cleanse because this is what you really need. That's all a bunch of horseshit. So, what I'm about to tell you is important and really important. So listen carefully. Don't half listen, don't multitask. This part matters. The excuse you keep repeating is the reason that you're not losing weight. It's not your schedule, it's not your stress, it's not your kids, it's not your age, and it's not your hormones. Those are not causes. They're cover stories. If you were losing weight, you wouldn't need explanations. Results don't require speeches. Results actually shut you up. The fact that you're still explaining tells you everything you need to know. Here's the truth that you keep stepping around. You're not stuck. You're choosing every day, every meal, every time you say I can't right now, instead of telling the truth. I don't want to. That sentence is the problem. So turn the volume up because you don't have a time problem, you have a priority problem. You don't have a metabolism problem, you have a consistency problem. And you surely don't have a knowledge problem, you have a follow-through problem. You already know it works. Eat fewer calories than you burn. That's it. Stop grazing, stop drinking your calories, stop pretending weekends don't count, or acting like one hard day invalidates the next decision. None of this is complicated and none of it's hidden. The industry loves and pretends it's mysterious. It's not. What you lack is not information, it's ownership. The excuse you repeat sounds reasonable, right? That's why you keep that. It protects you, lets you feel justified when nothing changes, and it's lets you say you're trying when the scale doesn't move. It gives you a story that sounds adult and responsible while your behavior stays exactly the same. You tell yourself you'll focus when life calms down. Life doesn't fucking calm down. You tell yourself you'll be consistent when your motivation shows up. Motivation doesn't stick around, it always leaves. You tell yourself you'll start when the conditions improve. Love that one. Conditions never improve. You're waiting for permission to choose differently. That permission never comes. Here's the part that should really bother the shit out of you. If your excuses were true, you'd be closer by now. Not perfect, closer. More control, consistency, less confusion. You're not. That tells you the excuse is not a reason, it's a shield. Every time you say I can't, what you really mean is I'm choosing not to. And as long as you keep bullshitting yourself about that, the weight stays exactly where it is. So today we're not talking about diets, because you know I don't like to talk about diets. We're not talking about workouts, we're not talking about motivation. We're talking about the sentence you repeat every day that keeps you from losing weight. Because until that sentence dies, nothing else changes. And until that sentence dies, the weight stays exactly where it is. The real definition of an excuse, an excuse is it's not a reason, it's decision dressed up to look responsible. That matters because reasons lead to solutions. Excuses lead to repetition. If something were actually stopping you, you'd be adjusting, you'd be experimenting, you'd be changing inputs. Instead, you keep saying the same sentence and expecting a different outcome. That tells you exactly what you're dealing with. An excuse exists to protect behavior, not explain it. When someone says, I just don't have time, they're not describing a fact. They're making a choice and asking you not to question it. Time is not something you do or do not have. Time is something you spend, and you spend it exactly where you want to. Whether that's on your phone, streaming, sitting on your ass, snacking, scrolling. None of that happens by accident. I don't have time really means this is not important enough for me to rearrange my day. That's not a flaw, it's a choice. The problem starts when you pretend that it's not a choice. Here's another one of my favorites. I'm too stressed out right now. I mean, that sounds compassionate, right? It sounds modern, it sounds like self-awareness. At the end of the day, it's still an excuse. Stress does not remove your ability to choose. Stress reveals what you choose under pressure. If stress forced behavior, everyone would respond the same way. But they don't. Some people tighten up, some people check out, some people eat, some people move. Stress does not decide you do. I'm too stressed, really means I'm using stress as permission to avoid discomfort. Then, of course, there's I'll start when things settle down. That one is especially dangerous because it feels temporary, it feels patient, like it's a feels like a plan, but it's not. Things do not settle down, they shift. Waiting for calm is basically telling yourself you're gonna wait forever. This excuse survives because it has no deadline. You can keep saying it for years and never really feel dishonest. I'll I'll start when things settle down. You know what that really means? I'm not willing to act inside of real life. Another common one, I already know what to do. This is true, but completely irrelevant. Knowing doesn't create results, doing does. People love this excuse because it makes them sound and feel competent while avoiding actual execution. It turns knowledge into a hiding place. If knowing were enough, you'd already be done. But guess what? You're not. Here is the core truth. An excuse always sounds reasonable. If it didn't, you wouldn't use it. It has to pass your internal credibility check. It has to feel like make you feel like an adult. It has to sound like something a good person would say. That's why excuses are so effective. They don't sound like lies, they sound like explanations. But watch the pattern. Same excuse, same result. That's how you know it's not a reason. Reasons lead to change. Excuses lead to repetition. If a sentence you were saying doesn't force a new behavior, it's not a reason, it's a permission slip. Excuses also do something even worse. They delay ownership. They let you feel like the situation controls you instead of the other way around. That feels safer. Ownership actually creates some pressure and it forces action. Excuses remove urgency. They let you say, this isn't my fault. Well, the outcome stays exactly the same. But here's a simple test. If you said the same sentence for more than six months and nothing changed, it's an excuse. No exceptions. Real reasons demand adjustment. Excuses protect comfort. Once you see that distinction, you cannot see it. And once you stop calling excuses reasons, you lose the ability to hide behind them. And that's where change actually. So if you're wondering what the cost is of sticking to the same script, let me show you how repeating the same excuse stalls progress. Every excuse you repeat has a cost, not a dramatic one, not even an immediate one, actually a slow one. And that's why you can tolerate it. Nothing explodes or breaks overnight. There's no single moment where everything collapses and forces you to change. Instead, the cost shows up quietly. It leaks into your life a little bit at a time. And because it's gradual, you start to pretend that it's normal. You keep the same script and your energy never improves. You keep the same script and the scale never moves. You keep the same script and your confidence erodes inch by inch. And believe me, I know it firsthand. You wake up tired, not exhausted, just tired enough to avoid the effort. You get through the day, you know, you're not productive, you're just kind of functional. And you tell yourself, this is what adulthood feels like, this is what it feels like to get older. Guess what? It's not. It's what avoidance feels like. The cost of repeating the same excuse is not just physical, it's psychological. Every time you say the sentence and do nothing, you reinforce a pattern. You teach yourself that words mean nothing. You tell your own brain that you're someone who talks and doesn't follow through. And that's not motivational language, that's training. Over time, you stop trusting yourself. Believe me, I know that firsthand. I stopped trusting myself completely. You stop believing your own intentions. You assume that every plan will eventually fall apart, so you stop committing fully. You've half-tried everything. And half-trying produces exactly the kind of results you're living with right now. Then comes the quiet compassion. You see other people changing, not influencers because they're a bunch of jerk ups, but real people, coworkers, friends, people who used to be just like you. And instead of feeling aspired, you feel irritated, a little defensive. You tell yourself they have more time, better genetics, fewer responsibilities, whatever the excuse is. That comparison stings because part of you knows the truth. They didn't find a secret. They stopped repeating the same sentence that you're still using. They cut the bullshit. And here's where it gets personal. Because I live this. For years, I had a reason ready. Work, stress, travel, scandal. I can explain my weight perfectly. I could tell a convincing story about why now wasn't the right time. And because the explanation sounded intelligent, I actually believed it. Meanwhile, my energy was shit. My health definitely kept getting worse to the point where I was literally on death's doorstep, and my body kept changing in a direction that I didn't want. Nothing forced me to stop until the cost got too high to ignore. And by then, the damage was real. Medications, hospital stays, doctors not negotiating with me anymore. That's where repeating the same script eventually leads if you let it run long enough. And I get it, your cost may not look like that yet, but it will look like something. Missed photos, avoided mirrors, clothes that you stop buying, chairs that you avoid, I avoided, wicker at all costs because they're afraid it was going to explode underneath me. Stairs that you won't go up, experiences you quietly opt out of because your body feels like a liability instead of a tool. That's the real cost, not weight. It's the loss of agency and loss of the things that you enjoy. The most dangerous part is how normal it all starts to feel. You adapt to the discomfort. I did. You lower your expectations. You tell yourself, eh, this is fine, it's manageable. This is just how life is now. That's not acceptance, that's fucking surrender. And here's the final piece you need to hear. The cost definitely compounds. The longer you repeat the same excuse, the harder it becomes to challenge it. It becomes familiar and safe and automatic. You even stop questioning it. It turns into identity. I'm just someone who struggles with this. No, you're someone who keeps saying the same shit and getting the same result. The script only has power because you keep reading it. And the moment you stop repeating it, the momentum finally breaks. You know better. You know that excuses are just excuses. People don't cling to excuses because they're stupid. They cling to excuses because excuses are comfortable, they're familiar and predictable. And comfort is addictive. An excuse creates safety, not physical safety, psychological safety. It gives you a place to hide where nothing is demanded of you. No risk, no exposure, no chance of failing publicly or privately. As long as the excuse stays intact, you never have to test yourself. That's the real appeal. The excuse lets you avoid finding out what would happen if you actually tried. Because trying means you might fail. And failing would force you to confront something you've been avoiding, whether you're capable of following through or not. Comfort is very familiar, even when it hurts, even when it keeps you stuck, even when it quietly erodes your confidence. You know what life looks like inside that excuse. You know the routine, the disappointment. You know how to function in there. Change definitely introduces uncertainty, and uncertainty feels threatening. Here's the part most people don't want to admit excuses protect identity. As long as you can say I would do better if you get to believe that the problem is external. Time, stress, schedule, circle. You get to keep the image of yourself as someone who could succeed if conditions were different. That illusion is powerful. The moment you remove the excuse, there's nowhere left to hide. If you say I choose this, then the outcome actually belongs to you fully. And ownership, it's heavy. Ownership means you can't blame anything else, and it means the results reflect the behavior directly. That level of honesty scares the shit out of people. Excuses also remove urgency. They push action into the future where consequences feel distant. Not right now feels harmless. One more day doesn't feel dangerous, or one more week doesn't feel like a decision. But repetition turns delay into lifestyle. Believe me, I know. You don't wake up one morning and decide to stay stuck for years. You delay by a day, then you repeat that decision until it becomes automatic. Another reason excuses stick is familiarity. The excuse becomes a reflex. You don't even think about it anymore. Something triggers discomfort, and the sentence fires automatically. No debate, no pause, no choice, just repetition. That's not a lack of discipline, that's conditioning. And conditioning only changes when it's interrupted. I have to say that fear plays a role too. Fear of discomfort, of effort, of discovering your limits. Some people would rather stay unhappy than risk finding out they're capable of a hell of a lot more and still choose not to act. At least the excuse gives you a reason. Excuses also provide some social cover. I mean, they sound acceptable. If you say you're busy, stressed, overwhelmed, no one challenges that. Everyone nods, oh yeah, yeah, I see that. Everyone understands that reinforcement strengthens the behavior. You learn that excuses are rewarded with sympathy instead of accountability. And so that cycle continues. But here's the uncomfortable truth. People don't cling to excuses because they believe them. You don't believe that shit. They cling to excuses because they work, they keep life predictable, they keep expectations low, and they keep responsibility diluted. But there's a very definite cost of that. Every time you reach for the excuse, you reinforce the idea that action is optional. You weaken the connection between intention and behavior, and you train yourself to seek comfort instead of progress. Over time, the excuse stops being something you say and it becomes who you are. I'm just not consistent, or I've always struggled for this, or this is hard for me, or I've always been a big guy. Those they're not observations, they're rehearsed identities built from repeated avoidance. The moment you understand that, the excuse loses some of its power because you see it for what it is. Not protection, not wisdom, not realism. It's a coping mechanism, but a coping mechanism that has overstayed its welcome. And until you're willing to be uncomfortable without an excuse, nothing will change. So here's the one shift that breaks a cycle. Because every excuse you use survives because of one phrase. I can't. That phrase sounds harmless, it sounds honest and reasonable. It's none of those things. I can't is not a statement of fact, it's a refusal to choose. And that's why replacing it breaks the cycle faster than any diet ever will. Diets are fucking bullshit. The shift is simple. It's not easy, but it's simple. You replace I can't with I choose. That one change removes every hiding place. When you say I can't work out today, you're pretending something external is stopping you. Time, energy, schedule, short, whatever it is. When you say I choose not to work out today, the truth is exposed. You're not blocked. You're fucking opting out. That's uncomfortable. Good. Discomfort is the point. I don't know, I can't eat better right now because I choose not to eat better right now. I can't lose weight because my life is too busy because I choose to keep my current fucked up habits because they feel safer than changing. That shift strips the excuse of its disguise. You can no longer pretend you're powerless. You're forced to confront the actual decision being made. And here's why it matters. Behavior doesn't change when you feel inspired. It changes when you accept ownership. Ownership creates pressure, and pressure creates action. For years, 50 years, more than 50 years, I lived inside of I can't. I can't because of work. I can't because of travel. I can't because of stress. I can't because of family. I can't because of whatever. Those statements, honestly, they felt true, but they also kept me stuck. The minute I stopped saying I can't and start saying I choose, everything changed. It wasn't overnight and there was no magic. But immediately at the level that matters most, responsibility. When I admitted I was choosing comfort, I regained control of my life. Because choice cuts both ways. If I could choose comfort, I could choose differently. That realization honestly was uncomfortable. It removed my victim story, removed the illusion that something else needed to change first. And it put that spotlight right back on me. And that is where the progress actually started. I choose to eat this, forced me to slow down. I choose to skip my Movement forced me to own the consequences. I still own those today because, well, I do move, but I don't go to the gym. And maybe I should have more muscle, but I choose not to go to the gym. I do choose to walk too. I choose to stay where I am, force me to confront whether that was actually what I wanted. Most people avoid this shift because it feels harsh and it feels unforgiving, and they think it's going to make them feel worse. But the truth is, the exact opposite happens. Once you stop lying to yourself, your mind quiets down. There's no more mental gymnastics or negotiating or pretending tomorrow will be different without changing today. Choice simplifies everything. You stop asking, can I? And you start asking, Am I willing? That's the real question, and it demands a real answer. So here's the key distinction. The shift isn't about judging yourself, it's about clarity. When you name the choice honestly, you can finally evaluate it. You can decide if the short-term comfort is worth the long-term cost. Most of the time, it's not. But you can't make that evaluation when you're hiding behind I can't. The moment you adopt the I choose, behavior becomes adjustable. Not perfect, but adjustable. You can choose a smaller portion, you can choose 10 minutes of movement. You can choose to stop early. You can choose to correct the next meal instead of spiraling. Ownership gives you options. Excuses remove them. That's why this shift works faster than motivation, willpower, diets, or rule. It cuts straight through the denial and it forces alignment between words and action. Once that alignment exists, change actually becomes possible. There's a bunch of simple daily choices that I can tell you I use, and they beat excuses every single time. Every excuse you use survives because of one phrase. I can't. The phrase, like I said, it sounds harmless and reasonable and honest. It's none of those things. I can't is not a statement of fact. It's a refusal to choose. So let me help you call yourself out in real time. Excuses survive because people overcomplicate change. I think weight loss requires a dramatic overhaul or a perfect plan or a clean week or a fresh start. I'll start Monday. Whatever the bullshit excuses that you give yourself. That belief keeps you stuck because it creates friction before action ever begins. Simple choices kill excuses because they leave no room to negotiate. Not 10 habits, not a new lifestyle, not a complete reinvention. A few repeatable decisions that work even when life is messy and fucked up. So let's start with food, not rules, structure. Eating a consistent breakfast is one of the fastest ways to shut excuses down. Not because breakfast is magic, because it removes decision fatigue early in the day. When you start the morning with protein and structure, you reduce the chance of reacting later. You stop figuring it out at noon when you're starving and impulsive. Consistency beats creativity every time. The next thing I tell you is some anchor meals. An anchor meal is a meal you repeat. Same food, same portion, same structure. You don't think about it, you don't debate it, you don't optimize it, you just fucking eat it. Anchor meals eliminate daily negotiations. They remove the excuse. I didn't know what to eat. When the decision is already made, the excuse has nowhere to land. Then I would say cut your calorie bombs. Not everything, just the fucking obvious ones. Liquid calories, those crazy morning drinks, the mocha frappa, hoopa, what a with a thousand calories. Cut out the mindless snacks, extras that add nothing but volume. You don't need a perfect diet to lose weight. You need fewer hidden landmines. When you remove the easy excess, the scale starts responding without the drama. And now let's talk about movement. Something that I didn't do a lot of, but now I do. Choosing movement instead of sitting is not about workouts. It's about breaking inertia, walks, standing, taking stairs, parking for the way. Short bursts done consistently beats sporadic intensity. Movement works because it's accessible. You can't say you lack time for 10 minutes. You can say you choose not to, and that honestly matters. Everybody's got 10 minutes to do some kind of movement. And here's why the choices work. They're fucking boring. They're repeatable. And they don't require motivation. Accuses thrive on complexity. Simple actions starve them. When you know exactly what breakfast looks like, I didn't have time, disappears. When your anchor meal is decided, I didn't know what to eat, disappears. When your movement is just built into the day, I was too busy, disappears. These choices work because they stack, not emotionally, but mechanically. Consistent breakfast stabilizes hunger. Stable hunger reduces impulsive eating. Reduced impulsive eating lowers calorie intake. Lower intake produces weight loss. That's pretty fucking simple. No inspiration required there. The same applies to movement. Small frequent movement increases energy over time. Increased energy improves compliance. Better compliance produces results. It's not exciting, but it's as effective as a motherfucker. Most people avoid these choices because they don't feel transformative. They don't give you a rush or make good stories or give you shit to post on Instagram. But results don't care about stories. They care about inputs. And here's the part a lot of people resist. You don't need more action. You need fewer repeated actions. The excuse wants variety. The body actually responds to consistency. If you try to do everything, you're going to quit. If you do one or two things daily, I promise you, you'll win. These choices rebuild trust. When you follow through on small commitments, your confidence returns. Not because you believe harder, because you actually have evidence, and evidence quiets those excuses. Excuses can't survive in an environment where behavior is already decided. You don't argue with yourself about brushing your teeth. You don't negotiate. You just do it. Those choices work the same way when you remove drama and repetition replaces emotion. The goal is not perfection. You're never gonna be perfect. The goal is execution. Simple daily choices beat excuses every fucking time because they don't give excuses anything to work with. And that's exactly why they work. All right, I guess at this point there's nothing left to explain. You don't need more information. You got a shitload of information. We live in the Google age. You can get as much information as you want. You don't need a better plan. There's thousands of fucking plans out there. You don't need a new start date. The start date is right now, as soon as we're done with this podcast. You need to stop repeating the same sentence that's kept you stuck and start choosing differently when it matters. Every excuse you heard yourself say while listening to this episode is familiar for a reason. You've used it before. It's worked before. Not to change your body, but to protect your comfort and to delay your action, to let you stay exactly where you are without having to admit that you're choosing it. Now you know better. You know an excuse is a choice dressed up is a reason. You know repeating it has a cost. You know clinging to it feels safe, but it actually keeps you trapped. You know replacing I can't with I choose changes the entire fucking game. And you know, simple, boring daily choices beat excuses every single time. The only question left is whether you're willing to act on that knowledge or keep pretending this year will somehow be different without you doing anything different. Here's what I can tell you from experience. I didn't lose 140 pounds because I found the right diet. I didn't keep it off because I discovered motivation, and I didn't change my life because things suddenly got easier. I lost the weight and kept it off because I stopped lying to myself about choices. I stopped negotiating and explaining and waiting. I built a system around ownership and repeated it until it became normal. That's the difference between people who change and people who keep starting over. If you want help staying grounded in reality instead of fantasy, start with my free weekly tips. They're not inspirational, they're not motivational, they're practical. One clear direction every week that cuts through the noise and reminds you what actually matters when excuses start creeping back in. They take under a minute to read, they show up consistently, and they built for real life. You can get them on my website at jonathanwrestle.com. If you if you can't commit to one minute of honesty per week, you're not ready for anything bigger. If you want the full framework that ties all this stuff together, read my book, Shut Up and Choose. Again, it's not a diet or a meal plan, it's not a list of rules that are going to fall apart the minute your life gets hard. It's the system that I use to lose 140 pounds without dieting, without gyms, and without pretending life was easy. The book breaks down why willpower always fails you, how excuses hijack your behavior, and how choices drive every outcome in your body in your life. Every single one, everything that's happening in your life is driven by choice. It's definitely direct, it's a little bit uncomfortable, and it works if you apply it. You can find that on Amazon. It's an Amazon bestseller. We've sold tens of thousands of copies. And for the few of you, and there are very few of you out there, but for the few of you who are actually ready to stop playing games with yourselves, there's one more option. I work one on one with people who are done pretending. I'm not supportive, it's not gentle, it's not for people who want encouragement while they keep making the same choices. It's for people who want results and are willing to take responsibilities for producing them. We don't diet, we don't starve, we don't chase motivation. We build a system that works in your real life and holds up when stress hits or your schedule changes, and those fucking stupid excuses try to come back. If that scares you good, that means you understand what's required. And here's the final truth: excuses did not ruin your progress. You did not lose weight because you keep choosing comfort. That can change today. Not with a promise, not with a restart, but with one honest choice followed by another. So stop explaining and stop waiting and make the choice. Because you know it's time to shut up and choose.

Annoucer: 30:39

Thanks for listening to Shut Up and Choose. If today's episode slapped you with some truth, good. That means it worked, and you've dropped the pussy attitude. Make sure to like, rate, and review, and connect with Jonathan on Instagram at Jonathan WrestlerFatLoss. On YouTube at Jonathan Wrestler, and the line at Jonathan WrestlerTum. Smoking choices. Jonathan Choose. Now, don't make a better fucking choice.