No-Filter Opening & Premise

Announcer 0:02

If you're a whiny snowflake that can't handle the truth, is offended by the word fuck and about 37 uses of it in different forms, gets ass hurt when you hear someone speak the absolute real and raw truth, you should leave. Like right now. This is The podcast where we cut through the shit and get real about weight loss, life, and everything in between, we get into the nitty-gritty of making small, smart choices that add up to big results. From what's on your plate to how you approach life's challenges, we'll explore how the simple act of choosing differently can transform your health, your mindset, and your entire freaking life. So, if you're ready to cut through the bullshit and start making some real changes, then buckle up and shut it up, because we're about to choose our way to a healthier, happier life. This is Shut Up and Choose.

Why Food Rules Fail

Announcer 1:05

Let's do this. Now you're host, shut up and rough.

Jonathan Ressler 1:13

Hey, welcome back to Shut Up and Choose the Podcast. And all that bullshit that I'm streaming and Instagram influencers and all those online coaches are telling you it's all a bunch of shit. They all give you these rules that they can't follow or they certainly don't follow, and they expect you to follow the rules. And that's what I want to talk about. I want to talk about food rules today and why food rules were made to be broken. See, I used to believe eating after 7 o'clock would make me fat. I know that's crazy, but seriously, I would watch the clock like a hawk. 658, okay, I can have a snack. 701? Nope. Forget about it. Suddenly the same snack was bad. I can't even tell you how many nights I stood in the kitchen hungry, frustrated, and telling myself, nope, it's past the cutoff. You'll ruin your progress. That's insane. If you think about it, it's just craziness. But here's the thing: my progress was already ruined. Not because of the food, but because of the rules. I wasn't failing because I ate a banana at 7.15. I was failing because I believed a made-up rule that had nothing to do with how my body actually works. And I know I'm not alone. Maybe you've done it too. I'm sure you have. Maybe you skipped breakfast because you heard that's the only way to burn fat. Or maybe you've avoided bread because someone told you carbs are the enemy. Maybe you've ordered a salad after salad thinking it was always the healthiest choice, only to discover later that it had more calories than the burger you actually wanted. So these so-called rules sound scientific, but they're really just noise. And the crazy part, they don't actually help you lose weight. In fact, most of the time they do the opposite. They keep you stuck. Think about it. How many times have you started a new diet program, felt motivated as hell at first, and then the rules became overwhelming? Suddenly you're living in a world of can't eat this, never eat that, and only eat at these times. Don't touch the carbs, avoid sugar at all costs. It's exhausting. And when you inevitably break one of those rules, you feel guilty. You feel like a failure, and the cycle starts all over again. So let me ask you something. What if the rules themselves were the actual problem? What if the very things you've been taught to follow, the rules that were supposed to make weight loss easier, are the exact things keeping you overweight, frustrated, and stuck in the same loop year after year. Because here's the truth your body doesn't give a shit about arbitrary rules. It doesn't know what time it is, it doesn't know if food is forbidden, it doesn't know whether your favorite snack is good or bad. What your body does know is how much energy you're giving it, how much movement you're doing, and how stressed you are about food. When you strip away all those rules and all that bullshit, you're left with something much simpler. Choices. And that's where the power is. Today, I'm not gonna give you another set of rules to follow. Today's about breaking the ones that never worked in the first place. It's about showing you how to stop letting diet culture dictate your life and start making choices that actually work for you.

The Guilt–Binge Cycle Exposed

Jonathan Ressler 4:20

So today we're gonna dig into some of the most common food rules out there, the ones that you've probably heard a hundred times, and we're gonna break them. Not just for the sake of breaking them, but to show you how freeing it is to live without these rules. Because when you stop dieting and start choosing, everything changes. So let's talk about what I mean when I say food rules. Food rules are those rigid one size fits all instructions we've been fed by diets, magazines, a shitload of influences, sometimes even well-meaning doctors. They sound like this don't eat carbs after dark. Always eat six small meals a day. Never eat more than 1200 calories. Avoid fat at all costs. Breakfast is mandatory, sugar is poison. They're framed like they're fucking commandments, like laws you have to follow if you want to be good. And here's the thing they don't come from science that respects individuality. They come from a system designed to control, restrict, and if we're being honest, sell you something. Now, what happens when you live your life by the food rules? You create a black and white world where every bite is either a win or a failure. You're constantly labeling foods as good or bad, and by extension, labeling yourself as good or bad depending on what you eat. And when you break the rule, because you will, we're all fucking human, you will break the rule, the guilt sets in. The shame takes over, you start thinking, I blew it, I'll never have the discipline to lose this weight. And guess what comes right after the guilt and the shame? A binge, of course. Because if you already fucked up the day, why not eat everything in sight and just start over again tomorrow? That's how the cycle keeps you spinning. Rules, then restriction, then guilt, then binge, and then repeat. It's not discipline, it's not self-control, that's a trap. And here's the kicker on all this. The $70 billion diet industry just knows that. In fact, it depends on it. Think about it. If diets actually worked long term, the industry wouldn't exist. Nobody would need another program or another supplement, another meal plan. But when you live by the food rules that are completely unsustainable, you fail. And when you fail, you blame yourself. Not the rule, not the plan, not the industry, yourself. So what do you do? You go back for the next fix, the next detox, the next cleanse, the next miracle diet. And every time you start over with a fresh hope. This time's gonna be different. You know how many fucking times I told myself this time's gonna be different? But the cycle just repeats. And each time the industry caches another check. That's why I say food rules are not just useless, they're dangerous. They create mental stress, emotional baggage, and physical setbacks. They take away your power to choose and give it to a system that profits from your struggle. But here's the truth you don't need food rules to lose weight. What you need is freedom. The freedom to make small, smart choices without guilt, without shame, and without following somebody else's rule book. And that's what this episode is all about. So we talked about why food rules are such a problem, but I want to be more practical because I guarantee you've heard and probably live by some of these rules. I'm about to break them down. These are the ones that people tend to swear by, even though they've never actually helped them lose weight

Carbs at Night: Myth vs Reality

Jonathan Ressler 7:35

for good. Let's take them one by one. And this is just the first bunch of them. So rule number one is carbs at night make you fat. This is one of the most common myths I hear. Don't eat carbs after six, or they'll turn straight into fat. Well, here's the truth on that. Your body doesn't have a curfew. Carbs at 6 p.m. and carbs at 10 p.m. are the same exact fucking thing. They're fuel. What matters is the total picture. How much you eat, the quality of your choices, and how active you are. If eating late really made people fat, every nurse working the night shift and every ER doctor, every entrepreneur burning the midnight oil would all be obese. And that's just not the case. The danger with this rule is that it makes people feel guilty about eating when they're genuinely hungry. So what happens? You skip dinner or you force yourself into a no carbs rule, and you get so hungry you end up binging on chips or cookies at 11 o'clock. That's not discipline. That's a setup. The smarter alternative there is to choose balance. If you want pasta for dinner, great. Add some protein, throw in some veggies, maybe, and keep the portion reasonable. Maybe even go for a short walk afterwards. That's a choice that fuels your body without guilt or restriction. The next rule is I I definitely lived by this one and believed it, and I know a lot of people who do. Rule number two is salads are always healthy. That one just kills me. Somewhere along the way, salad became synonymous with healthy. But let's be real, not all salads are created equal. I've seen salads at chain restaurants with more calories, fat, and salt than a cheeseburger and fries. Think about it. Fried chicken on top, croutons, bacon, cheese, creamy dressing, you can easily end up with a 1500 calorie salad. That leaves you just as stuck as the burger that you actually wanted. And here's the bigger issue: this rule makes people outsource their decision making. They think if I order the salad, I'm safe. But health isn't about categories, it's about

Are Salads Always Healthy?

Jonathan Ressler 9:40

choices. If you love salad, fuck it. Yeah, make it work for you. Choose fresh veggies, lean protein, a dressing you enjoy, but in a reasonable amount. And if what you're really craving is the burger, sometimes the smartest choice is to have the fucking burger. Because eating something you don't want in the name of being good backfires later. The third rule I want to talk about is skipping breakfast boosts weight loss. Okay. Intermittent fasting is trendy, and for some people it works. It works great. But here's the key phrase. For some people, the problem comes when we take something that works for a few and turn it into a universal rule. Skipping breakfast doesn't magically melt fat. For some people, it helps manage the hunger and it simplifies eating. But for other people, like me, it leads to mid-morning crashes, definitely overeating at lunch, and probably some brain fog to go along with it. The rule isn't skip breakfast. The rule is pay attention to how your body responds. If you feel great pushing your first meal to noon, then go for it. Absolutely. By all means do it. But if you're feeling sluggish and distracted or hangry, then maybe breakfast is the smarter choice for you. That's what I mean when I say weight loss isn't about rules. It's about choosing. The right choice is the one that works for your life, your energy, and your body. Rule four, I hear this one all the time too. Clean eating is

Skipping Breakfast: It Depends

Jonathan Ressler 11:05

the only way. This rule actually might be the most damaging of all of them. The idea that food has a moral value, that some foods are clean and others are dirty, is a recipe for guilt and obsession. Yes, of course, whole foods are generally better for your health. And yes, not eating processed junk makes a lot of sense. But when you moralize the food, you set yourself up to feel like a bad person every time you eat pizza, ice cream, or anything that isn't quote unquote clean. Food doesn't have morality. You're not good because you ate kale. You're not bad because you ate cookies. You're just a fucking human being making choices. And the truth is, sometimes choosing the cookie is the smarter move because it lets you enjoy life, stay sane, and avoid that all or nothing binge cycle. The alternative here is moderation. Eat mostly whole, nutrient-dense foods because they fuel your body, and they and then you can sprinkle in the fun stuff because it feeds your soul. That balance is sustainable, and that balance is real. Here's another one. Eating fat makes you fat. For decades, fat was demonized as the villain of weight loss. Low fat, everything line the grocery store shelf, low fat yogurt, low-fat cookies, even low fat peanut butter. And the rule is simple: if you eat fat, you'll get fat. But here's the truth. Dietary fat doesn't automatically turn into body fat. In fact, healthy fats, things like avocados and olive oil, nuts, salmon, they're essential for your body.

“Clean” Eating and Moralizing Food

Jonathan Ressler 12:40

They help regulate hormones, support brain function, and keep you feeling satisfied. So the problem isn't fat itself, it's eating too much of anything. When people cut fat of their diets, they often end up hungrier, reaching for more processed carbs and sugar just to feel full. And of course, that backfires. So the smarter alternative here is include healthy fats in your meals, but keep the portions in check. A handful of nuts, a drizzle of olive oil, half an avocado, those choices add flavor, satisfaction, and nutrients without derailing your progress. Fat is not the enemy. The real enemy is the myth that cutting it out will save you. Another one I always hear is cheat days are absolutely necessary. The diet industry loves to promote the idea of cheat days. Follow the rules all week, then go fucking wild on Sunday. It sounds like balance, but it's actually a setup. Here's why. All or nothing cheat days teach you to swing between extremes. You spend six days restricting and torturing yourself, then one day binging on everything you weren't allowed to have. That binge often wipes out the entire week of progress. And worse, it reinforces the idea that enjoying food is wrong. The smarter alternative, stop calling it cheating. Building flexibility into your everyday choices. If you want pizza on a Wednesday, have a slice

Fat Isn’t the Enemy

Jonathan Ressler 14:05

or two and then balance it with something lighter at your next meal. If you want dessert, enjoy it without guilt and just fucking move on. When you make room for foods you love every day, you don't need a cheat day. You just live your life. And that's the only way this thing works long term. So it just to recap, carbs at night don't make you fat. Your body doesn't know what time it is. Salad isn't always healthy. It depends on what's in the salad. Skipping breakfast is not a magic trick. It works for some, but not for everyone. Clean eating is not the holy grail. It's a trap that moralizes food and fuels guilt. You see the theme there? Every rules sound simple, but they fall apart in real life. When you realize these rules don't serve you, you get your power back. Because instead of following someone else's commandments, you start making small, smart choices that actually fit your life. And that's where the game changes. So if the rules don't work, what's the alternative? Well, this is where my entire philosophy comes in. Stop dieting and start choosing. Most people think weight loss is about discipline, willpower, or finding the perfect program. But none of that shit lasts. Diets are built on restriction, rules are built on rigidity, and eventually life happens. You get busy,

Ditch Cheat Days for Flexibility

Jonathan Ressler 15:25

you travel, you have a birthday, you go on vacation, and the rules get broken. And that's when the guilt comes and you go into that shame spiral. But choosing, choosing is different. Choosing is freedom, choosing is power. Choosing is about you, your life, your body, your goals. Not someone else's list of do's and don'ts. Think about it. When you follow a diet rule, you give up control. You outsource your decision making to someone else's system. You become dependent on rules to tell you what's good or what's bad. And as soon as you break one, you feel like a failure. But when you choose, you take the power back. You're no longer asking, am I following the rules? You're asking, what's the smartest choice for me right now? And that shift is massive because instead of operating in a world of restriction, you're operating in a world of options. You're no longer chained to no carbs after 7 p.m. Instead, you're saying, do I want to eat pasta tonight? If I do, how can I balance it so I feel good tomorrow? That's how real sustainable weight loss happens. Not through rigid rules, but through small, smart choices stacked consistently over time. And here's the beauty in choosing. It's not about overhauling your whole life in one shot. It's about small, smart choices you can repeat. Let me I'll give you a few examples. So easy one, swap soda for water. That's hundreds of calories you save in a week without counting, without tracking, without obsessing. Just one small, smart choice. Go for a 10-minute walk after dinner. It doesn't require gym membership or any fancy clothes. It doesn't take an hour today, but it helps your digestion, it lowers your blood sugar, and it gets you moving. Another small, smart choice. Balance your portions. Maybe you still have the burger, but you skip the fries or split them. Maybe you load up your plate with vegetables and lean protein before the carbs. Again, just a small,

Stop Dieting, Start Choosing

Jonathan Ressler 17:20

smart choice. And individually, I get it, they don't sound dramatic, they don't sound sexy. But here's the truth. These are the choices that add to real transformation. I lost 140 pounds and kept it off that way. Not by starving myself, not by cutting out food groups, not by living in the gym. I never went to the gym, but by stacking small, smart choices day after day until they become automatic. So when you choose instead of follow, you also eliminate the guilt. Because now you're not breaking the rules, you're making decisions. Think about dessert. Under the diet rules, dessert is bad. If you eat it, you failed. But under choosing, dessert's just another option. Sometimes you say yes, sometimes you say no. And either way, it's a choice that you owe. No guilt, no shame, no starting over Monday. That's what freedom really looks like. That's why people who choose succeed where the dieters all fail. And that honestly, that's exactly why I wrote Shut Up and Choose, because at the end of the day, weight loss isn't about motivation or finding the perfect diet, it's about decisions. Every time you eat, every time you move, every time you pour a drink, you're making a choice. And the truth is, most people already know what to do. You don't need another diet to tell you vegetables are good and soda isn't, or that sleep matters. You know that. What you need is the courage to stop outsourcing your decisions and the discipline and own your choices. That's the heart of my message. Stop dieting, start choosing. Because once you take back ownership, once you realize you have the power to choose differently, everything changes. That's why

Small, Smart Choices That Compound

Jonathan Ressler 19:00

my program is called Live Life, Love Food, Lose Weight. Because you don't have to give up your life to get healthy. You don't have to hate food to lose weight. You don't have to live in a world of sacrifice. You can enjoy dinners out, you can love dessert, you can travel, celebrate, and still see results as long as you're choosing. The key is to stop thinking in terms of rules and start thinking in terms of trade-offs. You're not saying I can't have this, you're saying if I choose this, how do I balance it? That's what makes this sustainable. That's why I kept the 140 pounds off for over two years. Not because I was perfect, not because I followed every rule because there were none, but because I learned how to choose in a way that fit my life. So here's the big takeaway. Diets fail because they force you into someone else's rule book. Choosing works because it puts you back in control. Rules tell you what you can't do. Choosing reminds you of what you can do. Rules leave you guilty when you fail. Choosing leaves you empowered no matter what you decide. And rules make weight loss temporary. All of us have been on the yo-yo diet wheel. But choosing actually makes it permanent. And that's why the only real alternative to dieting is choosing. Because when you stop dieting and start choosing, you stop living in fear of food. You stop chasing perfection, you stop failing over and over again. Instead, you start stacking wins. You build freedom, you start living life-loving food and losing weight for good. So I'm going to land the plane real quick here with something that my business, my executive listeners will immediately recognize. Think about how companies run. Do great leaders manage business with rigid rules that can't be bent or broken? Of course not. Companies thrive because leaders adapt, they strategize, and make smart calls based on the circumstances in front of them. Markets shift, competitors emerge, technology changes overnight. A rigid set of rules might look good on paper, but in real life it collapses the moment things stop going according to plan. Successful leaders know it's not about sticking to a script. It's about making informed decisions, adjusting when necessary, and playing the long game. Big news flash. Your health works exactly the same way. When you follow diet rules, no carbs after seven, never eating sugar, fasting is the only way. You're basically trying to run your body like a business that refuses to change. And just like that business, when life throws you something unexpected, like travel, stress at work, some family event, those rigid rules break down. You can't follow them perfectly, so you abandon them altogether. That's the health equivalent of a company folding because it didn't adapt. Now compare that to leading with flexibility. Great executives look at the bigger picture. They don't obsess over every single tiny detail. They focus on strategy, they focus on systems and long-term outcomes. That's what choosing in your health is all about. You don't need to follow someone else's arbitrary rules. You know, you just need to step back, look at your options, make the smartest choice in that moment. And over time, those small, smart choices compound, just like small, smart business decisions compound, into growth and profitability. So flexibility always beats rigidity. In business, rigid companies die. In health, rigid diets fail. But flexibility, the ability to adapt, to adjust, and keep moving forward, that's what creates sustainable success. So let me put it another way. You wouldn't bet your company's future on one strategy that had a 90% failure rate, would you? But that's exactly what people do when they bet their health on diet rules. Diets fail 95%

Freedom from Guilt, Power to Choose

Jonathan Ressler 22:30

of the time. Choosing, that works 100% of the time because it's built on your own decisions, your own life, and your own reality. So here's the takeaway here. Stop running your health like a rule book. Start running it like a business. Stay flexible, adapt when life happens, focus on systems and strategy, not perfection. Because, like in a business, successful health isn't about following the rules. It's about making smart choices that keep you moving forward. And when you approach your health that way, you win every single time. So I'm going to try to bring it all together now. Because we started today talking about the food rules, those rigid one-size fits-all commandments that the diet industry loves to sell us, the no carbs after dark, the salads are always healthy, breakfast man's you know this shit. On the surface, they do sound simple, but in practice, they create guilt, shame, and ultimately failure. They trap you in a cycle that keeps you stuck and keeps the $70 billion diet industry thriving. I hope I broke those rules apart for you. We looked at why your body doesn't have a curfew, why a salad can sometimes be worse than a burger, why skipping breakfast works for some but not others, and why moralizing food only makes you feel like a shitty person for eating dessert. Rule after rule, the pattern's clear. Rigid restrictions don't create success, they sabotage it. And that's where the alternative comes in. Choosing. When you stop dieting and start choosing, you

Leadership Analogy: Flexibility Wins

Jonathan Ressler 24:00

take back control. Instead of asking it, Am I breaking a rule? You ask, what's the smartest choice for me right now? That that shift is everything. It's what helped me lose all the weight and keep it off, not by living perfectly, but by stacking small, smart choices day after day until they became my essentially default way of living. I also drew a little parallel to business because some of my executive listeners know this better than anyone. Companies don't win by following rigid rules. They win by adapting, by strategizing, and by making smart decisions in real time. Health is no different. Flexibility beats rigidity, systems beat willpower, choices beat rules. So here's your takeaway. You don't need another diet, you don't need more rules. You need the courage, the balls to choose. Because when you choose consistently, intentionally and wisely, you not only lose the weight, but you gain your freedom back. And that's what shut up and choose is all about. That's what live life, love food, lose weight is all about. So if this episode hit home for you, here's what I want you to do. Take one food rule, one dumb fucking rule that you've been following, just one, and break it. Replace it with a choice that actually works for you. Then let me know about it. You can DM me on Instagram and drop a comment or share this episode with someone who's stuck in the diet trapper because you'll be shocked when you break the rules that you don't blow up, you don't put on 85 pounds. In fact, you'll find that having the freedom of choice is really nice. Because the sooner we stop dieting and start choosing, the sooner we start living. So I hope this episode opened your eyes to some of those crazy food rules. As usual, you can buy my book on Amazon. It's called Shut Up and Choose. It chronicles my 140-pound weight loss journey with no shots, no diets, no pills, no nothing, just purely the mental game. Also, if you are interested in coaching, I do some online coaching, one-to-one and in groups. You can check that out at jonathanwrestler.com. My name is JonathanRestler.com. You can also, I would say, if if you're not sure what you want to do, if you're not sure how you want to start, I have some free weekly tips. They go out every single Wednesday to your inbox. They take less than a minute to read, and they have real things that you can do to help you lose weight. And they're not crates, not cut this. It's just little mindset tricks to help you lose the weight. You can get those at JonathanRusso.com slash free tips. So just go to my website and look for where it says free tips and sign up for my email tips. Uh I'm not sending you like all kinds of shit trying to sell you on this or sell you my book or sell you on. I'm not doing any of that. They're just real free tips that help people lose weight. So that's all I got today. I hope you are wiser to the food rules. I'm sure there's 5,000 other food rules that you've heard from some jerk off on Instagram or some idiot online or some TikTok twit. Everybody's got a rule that works for them, but at the end of the day, they're all bullshit. The only thing that matters is making choices, making choices that fit into your life, not somebody else's rules. You create the rules, you create the system

Recap, Challenge, and Next Steps

Jonathan Ressler 27:10

all by yourself. You know what to do. I don't need to tell you, I promise you, you came wired in your DNA. You know if you're eating an ice cream cone, you're better off eating something else. I'm not saying don't eat it because sometimes you gotta feed your soul, but you know what to eat and what not to eat if you're trying to lose weight. The only thing left for you to do right now is to shut up and choose.