Raw Truth Warning

Announcer 0:02

If you're a whiny snowflake that can't handle the truth, is offended by the word fuck and about 37 uses of it in different forms gets ass hurt. When you hear someone speak the absolute, real and raw truth, you should leave Like right now. This is Shut Up and Choose, the podcast where we cut through the shit and get real about weight loss, life and everything in between. We get into the nitty gritty of making small, smart choices that add up to big results. From what's on your plate to how you approach life's challenges. We'll explore how the simple act of choosing differently can transform your health, your mindset and your entire freaking life. So if you're ready to cut through the bullshit and start making some real changes, then buckle up and shut up, because we're about to choose our way to a healthier, happier life. This is Shut Up and Choose. Let's do this Now. Your host, jonathan Ressler.

Stop Dieting, Start Choosing

Jonathan Ressler 1:14

Hey, welcome back to Shut Up and Choose the podcast that cuts through the noise and the nonsense and all the bullshit that the internet and those Instagram influencers, tiktok influencers, all those idiots are throwing your way. Telling you what to eat. Idiots are throwing you away. Telling you what to eat, telling you how to eat, telling you when to sleep it's all a bunch of bullshit. The reality is, none of them really know what's going on. Very few of them have ever been there themselves, in that place where you're fat and you're like whoa, I need to do something. The reality is, the diet industry is a scam. The weight loss industry is a scam. Most of the people on Instagram are scammers. Not that they're telling you is not accurate or didn't work for them, but the reality is it doesn't work for most people because weight loss is simple. You don't need a complicated plan.

Jonathan Ressler 1:57

So if you've been following me on social media lately, you'll notice that I've been using, I guess, a new phrase, a new term, and it's stop dieting and start choosing, and that really means something to me, and I want to really share what that's about the difference between dieting and choosing, because you know that I always said that I have never been well. Let me rephrase that on this last journey, I was not on a diet, not for one single minute. I was just choosing, making small, smart choices and choosing to be healthier. And really I think what it comes down to is when you're on a diet, you're losing weight to get healthy, and when you're choosing, you're actually getting healthy and you lose weight. And that's a huge difference, because if you go on a diet and you lose some weight, that's great, like you'll lose some weight. But as soon as you stop that diet, as soon as you stop doing that artificial thing when you're not living healthy again, you're going to put the weight right back on and probably a little bit more. So let me jump into this episode and tell you the real reason that diets keep failing and what you need to do instead.

Jonathan Ressler 2:59

Now, look, the reality is, if dieting worked, you wouldn't need another one. I wouldn't have needed another one. I've done hundreds. I didn't need another one. I don't need another one because

Why Diets Really Fail You

Jonathan Ressler 3:09

of what I'm doing today. So let's just say what everybody's thinking, but no one has the balls to admit. The weight loss industry is one of the most successful scams in modern history Billions of dollars in revenue. Thousands of plans and yet here you are. Here I was still stuck, still searching, still starting over.

Jonathan Ressler 3:32

Diets don't work, not long term, anyway, not sustainably, not for real people with real lives and real stress and real responsibilities. They sell you a plan in a box. You know some neat little rules about what you can and can't eat and how much water to drink or when to weigh yourself, what foods are allowed and which foods are bad. They sell you meal plans and macros and points and apps and subscription. It's a controlled system that promises to fix you if you just follow it perfectly. But here's the truth you don't need more control, you need more ownership.

Jonathan Ressler 4:07

Dieting is not empowering at all, it's outsourcing. You hand over your autonomy to a spreadsheet or a coach or a rule book. They tell you what to do and when you do it, and if you don't follow it to the letter, you're the failure, not the system. You, and that's the real scam. They make money and you blame yourself. So every time you fall off, you're trained to think the problem is you, it's your motivation, your willpower, your self-control. So you sign up for the next challenge, you try the next step, you join the next group and then it's like wash, rinse, repeat. The industry thrives on your repeat business because no one actually graduates ever.

Jonathan Ressler 4:48

That's why I say stop dieting and start choosing, because choosing is actually the opposite of dieting. Dieting gives you rules and then punishes you when you break them. Choosing gives you responsibility, which is why it's way more powerful than control. Choosing says I get to decide how I eat, how I feel and how I show up. I've said this before You're not a robot. You don't need to be tracked and managed. You need to get honest about the real problem. And it's not carbs, it's not sugar, and it's not missing the gym. It's the belief that someone else knows what's better for you than you do. So let's break the cycle. Let's stop pretending that the 17th time on this new diet is going to be the one that sticks, because we all know it's not. But you're not broken, you're not weak. You've just been lied to. It's time to take your power back, one small smart choice at a time.

Jonathan Ressler 5:44

So

Passive Dieting vs Active Choosing

Jonathan Ressler 5:45

when I talk about dieting, to me dieting is passive and choosing is active. And here's the trap that no one talks about. Dieting is passive right, it is. It looks like you're doing something. You're meal prepping, you're logging your calories, you're counting all kinds of stupid shit and you're restricting yourself, but really you're just following a script and it's someone else's script. It's a set of rules written by a stranger, someone you don't even know, who doesn't know your life, your stress, your schedules, your cravings, doesn't know anything about you. Dieting says here's the plan, obey the rules and don't fuck it up. You're not asked what you want. You're told what to do it up. You're not asked what you want. You're told what to do. And if it doesn't work for you, that's your fault, that's a you problem, right, no wrong. Actually, choosing, on the other hand, is active. It puts you back in charge. Choosing says what do I want today? What actually serves me right now? How do I want to feel when I go to bed tonight? And those questions, they change everything.

Jonathan Ressler 6:45

Dieting is rooted in fear fear of messing up, the fear of food, the fear of failure. It tells you one bite off plan, one bad meal or one skipped workout which was never a problem for me but one skip workout and you ruined it. You're out of control. You need to start over on Monday, whereas, on the other hand, choosing is rooted in identity. When you shift from fear-based dieting to identity-based choosing. You stop asking how do I follow this plan? You start asking what kind of person do I want to be? Because when your actions come from identity, consistency becomes natural. You're not trying to be someone else, you're becoming the version of you that actually makes better choices. So just to be clear people don't fail diets.

Jonathan Ressler 7:31

Diets fail people, real people with full lives, with kids, with deadlines, with late night cravings and emotional triggers and zero desire to eat bland, shitty food out of plastic containers. Diets ask for perfection. Choosing, on the other hand, asks for progress. Diets are temporary and choosing lasts forever. You know, I'm over two years into this thing and I'm still down over 140 pounds and I lose a little bit here and there, I gain a couple here and there, but the bottom line is I'm down over 140 pounds and kept it off for two years, and so what that shows you is that proving doesn't mean you get it perfect every time, but it means you own it every time. If you eat like shit today, you choose better tomorrow. It's that simple. If you skip the healthy habit, you choose to recommit, not restart.

Jonathan Ressler 8:20

Passive people diet. Powerful people choose. You get to decide. Am I going to follow another plan that wasn't built for me, or am I going to build a lifestyle that actually fits? It's time to stop following rules that you never agreed to. I guess you did agree to them when you bought them, but they're not made for you. So it's time to stop following all those rules that you didn't agree to or weren't built for you, and start creating a way of living that you don't need to escape from. So if you're wondering why diets keep you stuck, let's talk about the real reason

Breaking the Monday Mindset Trap

Jonathan Ressler 8:54

why you keep falling off. It's not because you're lazy and it's not because of your lack of willpower. It's because diets are built to fail you, and then they blame you when they do.

Jonathan Ressler 9:07

At the core of most diets is what I call the Monday mindset trap. You know exactly what I'm talking about. You eat like shit over the weekend. You feel disgusting. So you wake up Monday and say this time I'm really going to do it. I've said that a thousand times. So you restrict yourself, you punish and you're good until Thursday. And then the cravings hits and the stress. And you're good until Thursday. And then the cravings hits and the stress builds and you're tired and frustrated and hungry and boom right back to the pizza, the wine, the snacks and the binge eating. Then comes the guilt and the shame. I blew it, so I might as well go all in spiral. That's not a failure of character, it's a system failure.

Jonathan Ressler 9:44

Diets create a black and white food morality, good foods versus bad foods, cleaning versus cheat meals, saint versus sinner. So the moment you eat something bad, you don't just break a rule, you break your identity. You go from I'm doing great to I'm such a fuck up and the shame spiral starts spinning fast. And what happens next? You rebel and you binge and you say, ah, screw it, because I already messed up. Right. That's what I call the shame driven cycle restrict, then binge, then guilt, then restrict harder, then binge again. That's not sustainable. It never was.

Jonathan Ressler 10:20

And the worst part, you start believing that this is just who you are someone who can't stick to anything, someone who's always starting over, someone who always falls off. I convinced myself that I was incapable of making good food choices. I believed that. I believed that for a long time. But here's the truth you didn't fall off, I didn't fall off, you just made a choice. And the good news you're either passing or failing. Everything shifts, everything shifts. You stop spiraling and you start bouncing back. And that's how I lost 140 pounds without ever dieting. I stopped giving my power to the food rules. I started owning every single choice without shame, without guilt and without ever giving up the foods that I loved. So you're not broken. You're stuck in a pattern that's actually designed to break you. So it's time that we break the cycle instead.

Jonathan Ressler 11:36

So here's the truth that no diet influencer ever wants to say out loud Every single bite, everything you put in your mouth, is a choice. Every moment is a fork in the road. Pun intended. It's not a failure, it's not a personality flaw, it's not a reason to start over Monday, it's just a choice. And the second you realize that you take your power back. You see, dieting teaches you to follow Follow the meal plan, follow the rules, follow the macros coach with the abs and the fucking protein jug.

Jonathan Ressler 12:12

But choosing, choosing teaches you to lead, to lead your life, to lead your day and to lead your next decision. That's power, because once you shift from I blew it to I chose that. Now I choose this, you stop spiraling and start building momentum. So let me give you a quick example. So let's say, last night you ate some pizza, a lot of pizza, okay, big deal, fuck it. You chose it. Own it. Today. You choose you know what? Hydration. I'm going to drink more water than I usually do. You're going to choose movement. You're going to choose to sleep instead of scrolling Instagram at midnight. That's what builds that bounce back muscle that I always talk about.

Jonathan Ressler 12:51

It's not being perfect, but learning how to recover fast, without the drama. Choosing actually gives you agency. You're no longer some helpless passenger in your own life waiting for Monday to save you. You become the driver. Choosing also creates resilience. When life punches you in the face because you know it always will you don't fall apart and blame your diet app.

Jonathan Ressler 13:13

You pause, you recess, you pivot, you say, hey, what's the next best choice I can make right now? And then you make it. And then you make the next one. You don't need the gym. You don't need a spreadsheet. By the way, going back to the gym thing, I'm going to do an episode in a week or two. I haven't decided what I'm doing yet and why.

Jonathan Ressler 13:32

The gym is the absolute worst fucking tool you could possibly use for weight loss. I'm not saying the gym is bad, but the gym is a horrible weight loss tool, but anyway, you don't need the gym, you don't need a spreadsheet, you don't need another $10,000 coaching package with food rules and fake cheerleading. You need to choose and then choose again. Every meal, every snack, every stress, eating urge, every time you hear the voice that says fuck it. Every one of those moments is a power portal. Will you give it away again to the same old cycle? It's kept stuck when you grab the wheel because the people who win this game, they don't always choose right. I don't always choose right. I never have. I choose wrong a lot, but I don't run on perfection, but I do run on ownership.

Jonathan Ressler 14:19

So if you had a bad weekend, if you're bloated and you're feeling like a pig, you're off track and you're mentally beating yourself up, just say this instead hey, that was then. I chose that, but now I choose better. And then prove it and again. That's how I lost all the weight, that's how I stopped my clients from spiraling. That's how you can take your life back. Just one powerful choice at a time. You're not on a diet, you're becoming someone new. That's the shift. That's the difference between another crash and burn plan and permanent change Diets. They keep you stuck in temporary mode. I'm on a plan.

Three Small Smart Choices

Jonathan Ressler 14:58

Hey, I can't eat that right now. I'm trying to be good. But choosing wires the way you think about yourself. It says I live differently now. I'm not on anything, I am something.

Jonathan Ressler 15:09

When you operate from diet identity, you treat every choice like a fucking landmine. You worry about falling off. You feel like you're faking it. You wear your past failures like a scarlet letter. Worry about falling off. You feel like you're faking it. You wear your past failures like a scarlet letter.

Jonathan Ressler 15:21

But when you shift into choice-based identity, everything changes. You stop seeing yourself as someone who's trying to lose weight and start seeing yourself as someone who lives in alignment with who they want to become. Again, I said this earlier you can lose weight to try to get healthy or you can get healthy and lose weight, and I promise you the second one is better. So that shift from seeing yourself as someone who's trying to lose weight to someone who's living in alignment with who they're trying to become, that shift it's everything. Because, guess what, you're not fat, you're not lazy, you're not a failure. You're someone who's been making choices based on survival and stress and shame and systems that were triggered and rigged to keep you stuck.

Jonathan Ressler 16:03

Now you can choose differently, not because you're chasing a goal on the scale, but because you're done living out of alignment with your values, your energy and your vision. You're becoming the kind of person who drinks water because it serves your clarity, who goes to bed early because your energy matters, who fuels your body in ways to let you perform, not just survive. And when you make a choice that doesn't align, you don't spiral, you don't say screw it, you say eh, that's not who I am anymore. That identity shift is powerful, because identity is what holds when willpower breaks. That's why I don't sell diets, I sell mindset. I teach self-leadership, I teach choice and you better believe that's why it works for me, for my clients and for anyone who's sick of the yo-yo.

Jonathan Ressler 16:53

You don't need another reset, you don't need another 30-day plan. You need to start asking what would the next best version of me choose right now? Then do that, not perfectly, just consistently enough to change the story you tell about yourself. Because when your choice is aligned with your identity, you stop fighting yourself, you stop trying to change and you become the person who already has. So I know I said it 15 times, 20 times today, but I'm going to say it again you don't need another diet, you don't need macros, you don't need a food scale, you don't need to start Monday, you don't need to go to the fucking gym. You need to start choosing, and not in some abstract, motivational poster kind of way. I'm talking about real, repeatable, daily decisions that move you forward. Not perfect, not restrictive, not complicated, just smart.

Jonathan Ressler 17:48

So here's the question that literally changes everything. I know it's going to sound silly, but does this choice move me closer to where I want to be? That's it. Does this choice move me closer to who I want to be? That's it. Does this choice move me closer to who I want to be? That's it. It's not. Is this allowed? Is this on my plan? Will this ruin my progress? No, fuck that mindset that's dieting. Instead, ask yourself does this move me closer to the identity I'm building? Is this in alignment with the version of me who's already won? If the answer is yes, great, then you just made a power move. If the answer is no, also great, because now you're awake, you can make the next one better. It's not about getting it perfect. It's about stacking up reps in the right direction.

Jonathan Ressler 18:31

So here, let me show you exactly how to begin. So I would tell you start with just three small, smart choices. Don't overhaul your life. Don't turn your fridge into a science lab. Don't throw away everything in your pantry and replace it with kale. Start here.

Jonathan Ressler 18:46

Drink 24 ounces of water the minute you get up. Why? Because hydration impacts hunger, energy, mood, metabolism, willpower and a whole bunch of other things. Starting your day with a win creates momentum, and most people confuse dehydration for hunger all day long. You're not hungry, you're dry. I just did a 72 hour water fast and I gotta tell you at the end of the third day, I still wasn't hungry. I drank enough water, and I'm not going to tell you how much weight I lost in that thing, because it's crazy, but the reality is I wasn't hungry at the end of 72 hours. You don't need to eat nearly as much food as you think. So before you eat, sip drink. You don't need any fucking lemon in it, you don't need to make it warm. Just get 24 ounces of water in your body before you grab your phone or your food. That's a choice that builds you.

Jonathan Ressler 19:38

The second small, smart choice that I want you to make right now, as soon as this podcast is over is cut one mindless snack. Don't track every calorie, don't weigh your fucking almonds. Just look at your day and ask where am I eating without intention? Chances are it's while you're driving or you're scrolling on your phone. You're standing in front of the fridge or even finishing your kid's leftovers. Pick one of those and cut it. That's it. Not forever, not as a rule. Just today. One snack gone, that one decision can save you I don't know. Two, three, four hundred calories a day without even noticing. Multiply that over a week and that's fat loss without any willpower.

Jonathan Ressler 20:22

And then third thing is take a 10-minute walk when you want to scroll. So, instead of scrolling Instagram or watching reels of people working out while you sit on your fat ass on the couch, take 10 minutes to move your body. And it's not about burning calories. You're not going to burn enough calories for it to matter. It's about pattern interruption. Your brain wants dopamine, your body wants freedom and your goals want action. So you get all three of those from a short walk and none of them from your 40th video on what someone else eats in a day. So when that itch to scroll? When you get that itch, choose motion over distractions. If that's it. Those are three simple rules, and they're not even rules. They're reps.

Jonathan Ressler 21:02

This isn't another plan you're supposed to follow perfectly. It's not a checklist where I'm going to give you a gold sauce. Hey, I'll send you a gold star in the mail. That's bullshit. And it's definitely not some rigid diet disguised as lifestyle advice. They're decision reps. That's what they are.

Jonathan Ressler 21:17

Every time you make a small line choice, you're strengthening your ability to make the next one. That's how you build decision strength. That's how you build trust in yourself and that's how you build momentum. You don't need to change everything. You just need to choose something today that your future self will thank you for, and then do it again tomorrow.

Jonathan Ressler 21:41

This is how I did it. I can only give you, I can give you client stuff, but I have to get their permission to talk about them on the air. So here's how I did it. I didn't lose 140 pounds because I suddenly developed some monk level discipline. I didn't follow a meal plan or eat boiled chicken for 12 months. I just made better choices over and over again, even after bad days, bad weeks and setbacks. I'll be honest some days I chose better food, other days I chose to go to sleep instead of stress eating. Some days I didn't choose well, but I still made a better choice the next time. The difference is that I kept choosing. I didn't restart, I didn't wait for Monday. I wasn't ashamed, I just made the next choice, because dieting equals guilt and choosing equals growth.

Jonathan Ressler 22:30

You're not here to be perfect. You're here to get powerful, to take your life back, one bite, one step, one sip, one decision at a time. So stop tracking, stop obsessing, stop waiting for the right minute. Ask the question does this move me toward the version of me I want to become? Then act accordingly. You're not on a diet. You're building a better life. Just one small, smart, powerful choice at a time. So if you're expecting me to tell you that there was some magical turning point or before and after moment, let me save the suspense. There wasn't one. There was no day when I woke up and said this is it. I'm changing my life forever.

The Power of Imperfect Consistency

Jonathan Ressler 23:11

They were just small, smart choices. A bunch of small, unsexy, uncomfortable choices. I made one at a time. It stacked up over time and changed everything.

Jonathan Ressler 23:21

I didn't lose 140 pounds because I found the perfect plan. I didn't lose it just because I got a personal trainer, which I didn't do, by the way, or I joined the challenge, which I didn't do, or I had some crisis. Scare me straight. Well, that I kind of did. I was basically laying on my deathbed, but I lost it because I finally got sick of outsourcing it to someone else, to some diet, to some fad, to some trainer.

Jonathan Ressler 23:40

I stopped dieting and I started choosing. I didn't go to the gym, I didn't count macros and I sure as shit didn't eat perfectly. But what did I do? I chose. I chose to stop skipping breakfast and calling it discipline. I chose to stop eating like the day didn't count.

Jonathan Ressler 23:59

After 8 pm. I chose to walk, when I didn't feel like it. It took me a while to get there because, as you know, when I have told you many times 411 pounds, it was hard for me to walk. But I took more steps and more steps until I could finally walk two, three, four, five miles a day. I chose to sleep instead of snack. I chose to drink water before I grabbed for chips. Not every day, not every choice, but enough to matter.

Jonathan Ressler 24:29

And when I made a bad choice, I didn't freak out or fucking spiral, I just made a better one next time. That's the difference. So I will tell you, there was one night, about three weeks into this whole thing there's no more dieting experiment when I had a pretty shitty day. I hadn't slept much, I was stressed out at work. I definitely made some bad choices. Then by nine o'clock, honestly, I was starving and I stood in my kitchen staring at the pizza delivery menu Like it was some holy writing. The old me honestly would have called it screwed it. Get a whole fucking pie and eat the thing and think, yeah, fuck it, I blew it. So I'll start again tomorrow.

Jonathan Ressler 25:04

But that night actually something happened. It wasn't motivation, it wasn't willpower, it was just awareness. I said you know what I can still eat, but I'm going to choose something I won't regret tomorrow. That was it. I made a sandwich, I drank a glass of water and I went to bed. That one choice gave me more confidence than 10 pounds lost ever could, because I proved to myself that I could choose differently. That was the beginning of everything. Not because I found control, but because I realized I'd always had it. Every time I said I blew it, I was really just choosing to give up. Every time I waited until Monday, I was choosing delay. Every time I made a better choice instead of a perfect one. I was building the muscle that would carry me to 140 pounds lost and keep it off.

Jonathan Ressler 25:55

I didn't lose the weight by dieting. Let me say it again I didn't lose the weight by dieting in any way. I lost it by choosing daily, repeatedly and, most definitely, imperfectly. And you can do it too, because this isn't about me. I'm just sharing the story that I can share, which is my personal story. But it's about what's possible when you stop trying to follow someone else's plan and start writing your own, and one that's not based on shame, not based on restriction, not based on perfection, but based on power your power. You don't need to become somebody else, you just need to become the version of you who chooses better. And once you do that, consistently, imperfectly and relentlessly, the weight doesn't stand

Resources and Call to Action

Jonathan Ressler 26:41

a chance. So stop waiting for the perfect plan and start choosing today.

Jonathan Ressler 26:46

If there's one truth that I've learned from losing all this weight, it's this you don't need a perfect plan, you need a better choice. Diets love to sell you fantasy. Follow these rules, eat this food, don't screw it up. And when that doesn't work, you blame yourself again. But the truth is, you're not broken. You've just been trained to believe that someone else has the answer. And here's the real answer Ready, you do? You have the answer? Not next Monday, not when the calendar clears today.

Jonathan Ressler 27:20

So where do you start? Well, here's a couple things you can do. Number one is you can grab my free guide. It's the no Gym Guide. It's how I lost 140 pounds without a single gym workout, a meal plan or giving up pizza. Just 11 small, smart choices that actually work in real life, especially if you're busy and burned out.

Jonathan Ressler 27:35

You get my book on Amazon. It's no fluff, no bullshit, straight talking Amazon bestseller that walks you through my full story and shows you how to take your life back, one decision at a time. You can get my video course, which is called the Effortless Weight Loss Academy. You can get that at learnshutupandchoosecom. You can listen to this episode not this one right now, but you can listen to the how to Build Bounce Back Habits episode, because you're going to fuck up.

Jonathan Ressler 28:01

Everyone does the difference between staying stuck and getting results, that's learning how to reset fast. And if you're done with excuses and ready for a change, dm me on Instagram, jonathanwrestlerfatlaw, say I'm ready and I'll tell you how I can help you build a sustainable, no-nonsense strategy that fits your life. No gimmicks, sustainable, no-nonsense strategy that fits your life. No gimmicks, no diets, no gyms, no bullshit. Just better choices, one day at a time. So stop dieting and start choosing, because the reality is the choice is yours. The reality is the power is yours. The reality is diets are a fucking joke. All that's left for you to do right now is to shut up and choose.

Announcer 28:43

You've been listening to Shut Up and Choose. Jonathan's passion is to share his journey of shedding 130 pounds in less than a year without any of the usual gimmicks no diets, no pills. And we'll let you in on a little secret no fucking gym. And guess what? You can do it too. We hope you enjoyed the show. We had a fucking blast. If you did, make sure to like, rate and review. We'll be back soon, but in the meantime, find Jonathan on Instagram at JonathanWrestlerBocaRaton. Until next time, shut up and choose.